Seems Like a Reasonable Request to Me

A 26 year old man at a university in the U.S. got caught looking at porn and masturbating in front of a computer screen on campus. Security personnel started to take him into custody when he said, "I'm really close, can I just cum first?" Can you believe it, they didn't let him?! How rude! The judge sentenced the "offender" to six months probation. What, he can't jack off for six months? I'm glad I'm not a probation officer.