I Hope This Doesn't Use Up My 15 Minutes!
Earlier this week I submitted a question via email to a panel discussion called Amsterdam Forum that was to take place on Radio Netherlands. It turns out they used my question on the program. The website will let you listen to part of the program if you have Real Player, or you can get the times that they will broadcast a replay. I haven't been able to listen to it yet, so I don't know what they said.
Friday, January 31, 2003
But the Garlic Really Scared Them!
From De Telegraaf's (a Dutch newpaper) website: German police with weapons drawn, K9s, and a helicopter stopped a car on the autobahn because other drivers reported that they had seen the occupants in a rest stop pointing a gun at them. It turns the gun was a salami that they were eating for lunch. We must remain vigilant!
From De Telegraaf's (a Dutch newpaper) website: German police with weapons drawn, K9s, and a helicopter stopped a car on the autobahn because other drivers reported that they had seen the occupants in a rest stop pointing a gun at them. It turns the gun was a salami that they were eating for lunch. We must remain vigilant!
That Depends on How Passive Voice Is Defined
Passive voice is dead! It has been decreed from on high that we must cease and desist from any use of the passive voice. Oops, that last sentence used passive voice! Let me restate that: My superiors have decreed from on high that we must cease and desist from any use of the passive voice. It turns out that one of the letters a co-worker wrote came back to her to remove the word "was." In another instance one of the persons, who is so adamant about not using passive voice, attached a note which included passive voice to one of the returned letters. That person has also been characterized as the "agency asshole." Oops, that last sentence used passive voice! Let me restate that: Someone characterized him as the "agency asshole." Long live passive (aggressive) voice!
Passive voice is dead! It has been decreed from on high that we must cease and desist from any use of the passive voice. Oops, that last sentence used passive voice! Let me restate that: My superiors have decreed from on high that we must cease and desist from any use of the passive voice. It turns out that one of the letters a co-worker wrote came back to her to remove the word "was." In another instance one of the persons, who is so adamant about not using passive voice, attached a note which included passive voice to one of the returned letters. That person has also been characterized as the "agency asshole." Oops, that last sentence used passive voice! Let me restate that: Someone characterized him as the "agency asshole." Long live passive (aggressive) voice!
Thursday, January 30, 2003
Wednesday, January 29, 2003
How 'bout them Cowboys?
From the State of the Union speech: "Year after year, Saddam Hussein has gone to elaborate lengths, spent enormous sums, taken great risks to build and keep weapons of mass destruction. But why? The only possible explanation, the only possible use he could have for those weapons, is to dominate, intimidate or attack. With nuclear arms or a full arsenal of chemical and biological weapons, Saddam Hussein could resume his ambitions of conquest in the Middle East and create deadly havoc in the region."
What if we exchanged the name George Bush with Saddam Hussein in the quote above? Hmm....
From the State of the Union speech: "Year after year, Saddam Hussein has gone to elaborate lengths, spent enormous sums, taken great risks to build and keep weapons of mass destruction. But why? The only possible explanation, the only possible use he could have for those weapons, is to dominate, intimidate or attack. With nuclear arms or a full arsenal of chemical and biological weapons, Saddam Hussein could resume his ambitions of conquest in the Middle East and create deadly havoc in the region."
What if we exchanged the name George Bush with Saddam Hussein in the quote above? Hmm....
Tuesday, January 28, 2003
I saw this on a random blog that came up after I posted to my own blog. The translation is:
All the world
where I am not
appears perfect to me.
"A Virginia man who was trying to beat his dog to death with a shotgun accidentally shot himself to death." Found on Harper's website. Was the man also indicted for manslaughter?
All the world
where I am not
appears perfect to me.
"A Virginia man who was trying to beat his dog to death with a shotgun accidentally shot himself to death." Found on Harper's website. Was the man also indicted for manslaughter?
Monday, January 27, 2003
You Want My Fingerprint? How 'bout I Give It to You in Your Eye?
The following is an account by a friend of mine about the lengths that we have gone to in our obsession for security. I guess it's security, can't think of any other reason.
"As he was accustomed to do, Mark went to his local supermarket to pay his
gas & electric bills. Mind you, there is a 50 cent charge for each transaction. That is only 13 cents more than it would cost to mail these items, but he likes the security of knowing the bills got paid. And he gets to interact with the store folk. And he had to go to the store anyway. The bills were very nearly past due. He does not want to get the reputation of being a 'late payer.' That goes on databases.
This dreary, drizzly morning, he set the checks on the mat before the clerk who was behind the counter. The clerk says, "Gee, that coffee smells real good." And it was darn good coffee, too. Mark explained where he got it and what kind to get. It was from a shop nearby. During this banter, the clerk slid an innocuous-looking round disk towards our humble billpayer. He said, "Will you put your left thumb there and then on your checks?"
Taken off guard a bit, Mark noticed it was a stamp pad. About the size of a half dollar. It had a handy plastic round cap -- no doubt to keep the ink wet while the pad was not in use.
He asked, "What's this for?" The lad replied the store now has everyone who presents checks at that counter to have their thumbprint on their checks. A precaution for fraudulent checkwriters, he said. He went on, "I know it seems a little 'big brother'. We used to just have the people cashing payroll checks do it. But my boss now wants everyone to."
Mark then said, "Well, I won't pay checks here anymore." He did not say this in a nasty tone. He did not mean to belittle the young man or put him on the spot. The booth clerk, of course, was only doing his job. Just before he turned to leave the line, he paused and asked, "If I pay with a check out there, at the registers, you don't have me give my thumbprint there. You run some scan on my check to see if the account is good or
something like that." The lad mumbled no real reply. Both remained good-natured about the whole affair. Each appreciated good coffee. All had begun well. Mark then said, "How many people turn you down on this." The clerk replied, "Oh, not many. Most people comply."
What's up with this? Sounds like neoliberalism without the smile.
The following is an account by a friend of mine about the lengths that we have gone to in our obsession for security. I guess it's security, can't think of any other reason.
"As he was accustomed to do, Mark went to his local supermarket to pay his
gas & electric bills. Mind you, there is a 50 cent charge for each transaction. That is only 13 cents more than it would cost to mail these items, but he likes the security of knowing the bills got paid. And he gets to interact with the store folk. And he had to go to the store anyway. The bills were very nearly past due. He does not want to get the reputation of being a 'late payer.' That goes on databases.
This dreary, drizzly morning, he set the checks on the mat before the clerk who was behind the counter. The clerk says, "Gee, that coffee smells real good." And it was darn good coffee, too. Mark explained where he got it and what kind to get. It was from a shop nearby. During this banter, the clerk slid an innocuous-looking round disk towards our humble billpayer. He said, "Will you put your left thumb there and then on your checks?"
Taken off guard a bit, Mark noticed it was a stamp pad. About the size of a half dollar. It had a handy plastic round cap -- no doubt to keep the ink wet while the pad was not in use.
He asked, "What's this for?" The lad replied the store now has everyone who presents checks at that counter to have their thumbprint on their checks. A precaution for fraudulent checkwriters, he said. He went on, "I know it seems a little 'big brother'. We used to just have the people cashing payroll checks do it. But my boss now wants everyone to."
Mark then said, "Well, I won't pay checks here anymore." He did not say this in a nasty tone. He did not mean to belittle the young man or put him on the spot. The booth clerk, of course, was only doing his job. Just before he turned to leave the line, he paused and asked, "If I pay with a check out there, at the registers, you don't have me give my thumbprint there. You run some scan on my check to see if the account is good or
something like that." The lad mumbled no real reply. Both remained good-natured about the whole affair. Each appreciated good coffee. All had begun well. Mark then said, "How many people turn you down on this." The clerk replied, "Oh, not many. Most people comply."
What's up with this? Sounds like neoliberalism without the smile.
Not So Super
It is with a heavy heart that I report the commercials were disappointing. The one with the little dog knocking the cap off of the fire plug was good, as was the one with the girlfriend and her big assed mother. But, all in all pretty much a let-down. Sorta like the game itself. The last few years have produced some close games that weren't decided until the very last seconds, but this one was like the games of yesteryear that were very short on excitement. It was like one of the teams would always get over-confident or over-excited, and wouldn't play worth a shit. Well, it happened again yesterday. The Raiders are better than they played in the game. Too bad that just one of the teams played up to its abilities.
It is with a heavy heart that I report the commercials were disappointing. The one with the little dog knocking the cap off of the fire plug was good, as was the one with the girlfriend and her big assed mother. But, all in all pretty much a let-down. Sorta like the game itself. The last few years have produced some close games that weren't decided until the very last seconds, but this one was like the games of yesteryear that were very short on excitement. It was like one of the teams would always get over-confident or over-excited, and wouldn't play worth a shit. Well, it happened again yesterday. The Raiders are better than they played in the game. Too bad that just one of the teams played up to its abilities.
Sunday, January 26, 2003
Super Sunday
It's time for that annual glorification of organized sanctioned violence and the advertising industry. I'm actually a football fan, but this is over the top. I find the commercials much more interesting that the game. Although, I must say that last year's crop was not very good. I hope they make up for it this year. If it was up to me, I'd do one with Saddam Hussein in it. Like drinking a Pepsi, or singing the praises of OB tampons.
Saddam Hussein (smiling, looking straight into the camera, holding a box of OB's in left hand with box clearly readable.) [close shot]: "I like my women to use OBs during that time of the month. I feel so good knowing they were developed by a woman gynecologist. I like my army to use Sarin gas during those difficult times. I feel good knowing it was developed by a man engineer."
It's time for that annual glorification of organized sanctioned violence and the advertising industry. I'm actually a football fan, but this is over the top. I find the commercials much more interesting that the game. Although, I must say that last year's crop was not very good. I hope they make up for it this year. If it was up to me, I'd do one with Saddam Hussein in it. Like drinking a Pepsi, or singing the praises of OB tampons.
Saddam Hussein (smiling, looking straight into the camera, holding a box of OB's in left hand with box clearly readable.) [close shot]: "I like my women to use OBs during that time of the month. I feel so good knowing they were developed by a woman gynecologist. I like my army to use Sarin gas during those difficult times. I feel good knowing it was developed by a man engineer."
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