Why Do You Seek the Dead Among the Living?

According to the French newspaper, Le Figaro, Osama Bin Laden is dead. Their researcher has concluded that he died in December 2001 in the mountains near Tora Bora. All the tapes and videos since then are fakes or montages from previous ones, the researcher says.

I Wanna a New Drug?

There's a new "drug" in India that will give you an illusionary and floating experience. But don't run out trying to buy it just yet. It's a scorpion sting. Yes, getting stung by scorpions will produce the sought after affect.

Atilla in a China Cabinet

I found a website in Spain where you can nominate a person or entity (like a company) for the annual Atila (as they spell it) Award. That's given to the person or entity that has caused the most environmental destruction. I nominated the Armed Forces of the United States for their massive destruction of the environment of Iraq.

Believe

"Serve me up some pret-tay, pret-tay people,
Serve me up somebody I can believe..."
-Joan Osborne

Didja ever wonder why all those people on cable news are always good looking? It's so they'll be believable.

That's One Way to Get Head!

A 24-year old man was running around in the border area of Germany near Limburg with a woman's head in one hand and a knife in the other. The article says he was arrested. He comes from Kosovo.

Roll Out Those Hazy Days of Summer

Yes, summer is here. No it's not you say, it's only May 6th. Well, if you're in Austin, Texas you know damn well that it's summertime. Yesterday the temperature was over 90, and today it's supposed to be again. That's really not the bad part; the bad part is that it doesn't get any cooler at night than about 73. But, the real thing that determines when summer's here is the haze. It's so fucking hot that the ozone and the hydrocarbons combine to form a haze over the entire area (hell, over the entire state probably). When you get the haze the heat really has nowhere to go because the haze holds it in. Yes, it's gonna be a long, hot one. The rest of the world lives the winter months inside out of the weather. Here in Texas we live the summer months inside out of the weather, and summer starts in May and ends in November (when we're lucky and the summer is short). God help us all!

So, You Want to Kill Him?

Why not enter his Lotto for a good seat at the death chamber. Zacarias Moussaoui has offered a multiple choice quiz. If you answer the question correctly, and your name is drawn, you too can witness his execution. Good luck.