Eventually They'll Have to Use a Goddamn Forklift!


Funeral directors in Australia have a new challenge to confront. The people they're burying are so overweight, that the funeral industry association recommends that they use wagons and other lifting devices instead of carrying caskets on their shoulders. Damn, I hate those workers' compensation cases!

They need to start using those lovely bright yellow forklifts that beep when they back up. Imagine at the end of the funeral service a guy in one of those flourescent orange jackets comes driving a forklift in to pick up the casket. He puts the fork under the casket stand, then turns to look over his shoulder and beep, beep, beep, beep, beep...